Life

Life, what you all think about life?
(suddenly just have a thought of sharing......)
Do you all wonder how you all can change and how u all hope to change ur life? well.... I do hope....sometime....

someone did told me before, " Life itself is mysterious,it obnoxious!" agree? any comment on this?
hmmmm.... in my life, at my point, from what I see....

Honestly, I jealous, I jealous( just sometime), why everyone around me, same age as me....can have easy life, why everyone can have simple yet happy life in college? but me, I have to take up some issue, some problem, facing that and pull myself through? I jealous, y all my fren can just go for courses they like, courses that they wish from small, life that already arrange nicely, plan nicely, build nicely by parent.... but me? I have to create my own life by my own hand, I decided my life, I control my life, I have to build the road inch by inch, stone by stone.....

Sometime, I am tired, I just wish, sometime, there will be someone arrange my life for while, take away all these and let me rest and breath for while....

I know, somewhere out there, they are people are just the same situation as me, or... maybe worst.... I know, I am not the only people with all this sad tired life. There are more, right?? so.... keep it up Sam, you can do it!!!

Life.....
from my work, from place I study... I realize, Life is short... is so spontaneous... sometime, someone life can just end so suddenly... but at the same time, some life are just so strong and they try and try to life on.... and they do success and make wonder in these world!

Well, there are lot of things that I can't control,  I can't control which family I want to born to, but thing that I can't control, I will try to control, I determine my destiny in the future...I control how I want to be in the future...

So just hang on.... everything will going smooth later.......
that just the balance of life, the circle of life..... right?

Life Quotes:

"Life the life 

you want to live.

Be the person 

you want to remember.

make decision,

make mistake,

If you fall,

at least you tried."

* gonna sleep now..... sooooo tired.......nite.

love

Weakness

Weakness, I don't think everyone will have that courage to recommend their own weakness, do you?

well... I am just the same. I run away, avoid to face it...I think most people will do that right? or... maybe, just me...

I run away from all those problem around me, don't want to face it, but the problem didn't solve, it just grow bigger and bigger and now .. when I have to face it, when I want to face it, it already press me till I hardly can breath! GOSH!

What to do? I still have to settle all of these right? Need to do it one by one.....

But, is not too late when I want to face it right?

oh ya, get my result today, my result drop dramatically! I am sad.... but I think, I should take up the responsible, I am lazy.....* smash myself! *

promise I myself I will do very well in the coming semester! I will! FOCUS FOCUS and FOCUS!!!!

Last 2 sem! although is very hard, but I can do it! pull myself through, then I can just leave this hell place!

WEAKNESS! I am nt scare of u! I will fight till the end!

Notty Doggie DOG

She is a very Notty dog,
full with curiousity,
Jumping n biting here n there ( the biting part! I hate the most! although I know she is just playing...)
but,
She is cute!adorable! n funny! ( can't stop laughing look at her)

oh well, is my friend's English bull dog...
have chance to play with her...

Love her so much! muah!

Emo

Emo much!!!!

sorry peepals~ I am just like a baby!
hmmm..... sometime just come ahead with lost control with my emotional... or it just change so sudden...
I hate to be emo too... make me feel sad, appear all those stupid sad thing in my mind... so messy... HATE IT!!
make my tear rolling in my eyes... so stress... hate everything around me....

I just hope to get a lil cuddle frm frens.... just a lil sayang perhaps? ( like a baby right? )
well.... as u know me..... I will turn into this very easily.. depends on seasons.....n something it will cause a big quarrel and I just lost my fren like that... that me....maybe somebody understanding???
( hmmmm... I was thinking, who knows me more around me.... anyone? I think, no one, nt even my family, or my best fren? hmmm... I think... the longest frenship with her... really appreciate her, always stay beside me.. although, we do quarrel~ but she din leave me... right? bestie?   )

Sad sad sad..... I hate tears! I hate crying! feel so weak when there is no shoulder for me to lay on, I hate this feeling!
was thinking how long I force myself nt to cry out.....( my tears used to come out very easily, I did cry alot along this year! trust me.. is alotx! than u all can ever imagine.....but dunno when.... this scene stop.... )  I want to be stronger and stronger! in every aspect!!!!! so I stop myself to be that weak, stop my tear coming out.

Don't ask me to prayer..... I don't believe in this.....
so... anything can help me? I hate this really really much!

I hate emo! but I cant control it! How???

A beautiful evening

Is one of our sport club event,
Once in a year of Tarik Tali and 4x100 race.

Well.... I was being judge in there....(gosh! just imagine I being judge! funny right? I didn't involve any sport in secondary sch...I run away from it!  and that day, because of my position in club, I have to take up this responsible... duh~ )
n..... I don't think I did a good job, very messy, disorientated, a lots of quarrel!
SOOOOOOO Sorry peepals!

but I get to took some beautiful piz from that day,
from my point of view,
the piz are beautiful!beautiful sky!  :)

discussion going on... 

Instead of peepal, I capture Tarik" Tali " , I wish I can capture everyone face while they all TARIK!
all so scary! shouting "Pull! pull! and Pull!!!!!" I was standing at the center( judge), seriously get scared!
so this piz.... feel more PEACE! don't u agree?? 

resting...

Sorry for all my beautiful frens who was in these piz.... I dun think they know I am taking these piz....
Dont KILL me when u all know.... plz.... is very nice piz... Don't u all agree???
Love u all... muah~

Love,

Guess what this??Donut??

oh my on my..........Peepal!! I have to rushing this all day long!
and I means....... produce this in large amount!
know what is this?

Dunno?? No idea what this Donnut is??

muahahaha....

the answer will be review soon~


Love,

A nice Cello song

Ola~

Just take a short while to share with all my frens a nice cello song... that my fren found it!
so nice......



Alright... have to chao now...
later have great game between our college... !
(trying to take great pix ya~ xoxo)

Love

What is Systemic Lupus Erythematosus ( S.L.E ) ??

Systemic Lupus Erythematosus
These is what I learn n want to share around with all my frens, ( is a important info that I think is good to know)


Do u all know?
Statistic show that....about 90% of SLE sufferers are Women !!!
10% are men n children.
About 90% of women with SLE are in their childbearing yrs, (range between 15-50 yrs old )

Ratio:
In MALAYSIA, is is estimated that more that 10 000  people have been diagnosed with SLE over 30 yrs!!! ( wow! that a big figure! I am shocked to know that! ) 
In the WEST, among Afro- Carribeans 1 in every 250-500 people
USA-1 in 2 000 people
China- 1 in 1 000 people

I take this information from our Persatuan Systemic Lupus Erythematosus Malaysia.
feel free to have a look in the website : http://www.lupusmalaysia.org/e/what-is-sle/


What is SLE? 
Is a Chronic, auto-immune disease of unknown cause where the patient's body makes large quantities of blood protein called anti-bodies that react against the person's own tissues.

Or what is LUPUS? 
is a Autoimmune Disease characterized by acute or chronic inflammation of various tissues of the body.
Autoimmune Disease = illness tat occur when body's tissues are attacked by its own immune system.

So, people with Lupus, produce abnormal antibodies in their blood that target tissues within their own body rather that than foreign body ( bacteria or infectious agent ).

Because antibodies +  accompanying cells of inflammation = it can affect tissues anywhere in the body.
( can cause disease of skin, heart, lungs, kidneys,joint and nervous system)

when Lupus is only skin involve is Lupus dermatitis, cutaneous lupus erythematosus, without internal disease is also called DISCOID LUPUS

whenever, internal organ is involve, is referred as SYSTEMIC LUPUS ERYTHEMATOSUS ( SLE )


hmm.... to have clearer picture.... let watch the video...


till now the cause of LUPUS still unknown,
it is believed that lupus has a genetic pre-disposition and something in the environment trigger the onset of disease.

Symptoms are...

• unexplained fever
• Extreme fatigue
• painful or swollen joints
• red rash or color change on face
• chest pain upon deep breathing
• unusual hair loss
• pale or purple finger or toes from cold stress
• sensitivity to the sun
• swelling in legs or around eyes, etc
• swollen glands

symptoms can come n go, can range from mild to severe. most lupus patient have a combination of symptoms. For further info... can load on this web pages : http://www.lupusny.org/


well.... I think is enough for now....feel drop question... then we can learn n discuss together... ;)
need to sleep now..... panda eyes is coming out....
Love,

Hospital

Hi,

It has been a while from my last blog,
life has been bit stress plus bit sad...bitter...
well...life still going on, that just what life is right?Combine all the taste, sweet, sour, bitter.... that what all people said... "u have to taste the bitter to know how sweet it is, right? "
My lappie just went into ICU, just get my lappie back from a good fren who help me to reformat it ( Thanks muchie!!! )......Yea... I am a IT dummy~ anything happen with my lappie.. I really dunno what to do, beside surf net and use it for assignment! ( pitty my poor lappie, I really dunno how to take care it.... till it SICK! ) haha~

Come back to this blog... Hospital? is nothing special beside the strong medicine, drug smell right? that what I feel when I haven attach nursing....
what I want to talk about it? well.... just said, I feel Hospital is a special place that is so different from everywhere else. As the time I posted ( having my practical ) long enough in hospital... ( I have been a student nurse bout 2 years now ), and I see a lots...

Is a place that, we receive a new life, and also let go another life...
is like a " life station"... everyone just come n go...... and feel like...life itself, just passer by every moment, every second...
I dunno how to explain what I had feel, cause it is complicated, and I still using time to digest it...

Let see, last month I having my practical at delivery suite n nursery, it a place that full of joyous, u can see that everyone is so happy to receive a new born life from every great mother, and the joy of new born bring to us ,it effect everybody else, people around are so happy n everyone just have the beautiful warm smile on their face to see the little cubby baby... talking that little baby look similar to daddy or mummy, thinking that what name for baby.. just like a seed of happiness, it drop and bloom a beautiful flower bring a beautiful scene.

But, here I am at ICU ( intensive care unit) for my another posting( practical period),
well.....it is not a happy place, all patient are really sick n they really depends fully on medical team ( all the doctor, nurses and technician).
The first day I step into ICU, I got a big shock... cause all patient are with soooo many equipment, wires everywhere, drip everywhere.... and they look sooo weak, is like one touch then they will crash n disappear( that just what in my mind.... ) and so... I am so scare n nervous to do anything in there...( luckily have all the train charged nurses and staff nurses guiding us--- that y our tutor call us " giddy goats " )

Till the 5th day of my posting... I come to face the real loss n grief.. a patient is going to pass away...
Okay, I study the theory part, I learn from the theory how to manage Loss, Grief, Care of dying...( is easy)
but when face the real situation....is not that easy as theory is... I found that... we really need to have strong heart to face to fact n the relative, for me... I am too scare to face it,the situation is so sad....n anger... n full of tears....

n so I just step a side, seeing how expert dealing in the situations....( they are my role models) I believe that as time pass.... I will learn to be like them soon.... cause I have to deal with this when I am a staff nurse.

That life, every seconds, there is people pass away and also a new born come into this world....
Life is mysterious. U never know what will happen to the next seconds, next minute... so why don't just live every seconds happily...agree??? ( that what I always told myself... although sometimes.. I am still lost in somewhere... haha...)


Alright, gotto go ready for my practical now....
Love,

Isn't it beautiful?

Hi,
Just found a beautiful art work that I want to share out! is so colorful and is soooo detail...
while watching the two artist painting... I was dreaming " How nice IF they can paint that in my room~ " hahhaaa

just love them~

I ♥ this Piz

My Buddies from young till now~

Hi,

Suddenly.....just feel like introduce all my bed buddies from young till now....

hmm... have a look...actually, there is a series of ty's bean teddy collection... I will collect cute ty's buddies ( if I like it, but recently I didn't found out any bear that I like~ so there is no new members of them )

U know? there is one in there that had already follow me since.... 12 yrs old... haha.... love it sooo much~

( sound like a kid huh? I think my dolls are more than my younger sister! omg~ ) 

well.... I don't care, I just like it :) hahaha~

love,